The Science Teacher
The science teacher explained to his class that long waves can go round objects but short waves cannot. Seeing blank faces, he picked up his hat, held it in front of his face and asked the nearest pupil, "Can you see my face?"
"Can you hear my voice?"
"What does that show?" He hoped for the answer that sound waves are long and light waves short, but the boy retorted hopefully,
"You're talking through your hat, sir." *
*be talking through your hat = to talk nonsense - to be talking about a subject as if you know a lot about it when in fact you know very little.
A teacher was giving her class of small children a lesson on good manners.
"Suppose, by mistake, you step on a lady's foot. What do you do?"
"I say pardon me."
"Very good. Now suppose the lady, to reward you, gives you a coin. What do you do?"
"Step on the other foot to get a second one."
In a school in the States, the teacher had just described Christopher Columbus' discovery of America.
"Just imagine, children, if he had not risked the ocean, you would not be here today. Wasn't he marvellous?"
All the children cheered, except one.
"Aren't you pleased young fellow?"
"I'm an Indian."